"Tom Brady’s a faggot."

A large, heavy-set guy comes in to buy a 12-pack of Coors Light. He’s wearing a Dallas Cowboy hat.

ME: “I didn’t think the Cowboy’s still had any fans.”

He laughs.

COWBOY FAN: “Fuck you! I bet you’re a Seahawk fan?”
ME: “To be honest, I’m not so into football, but I do like the Patriots. I like Tom Brady.  
COWBOY FAN: “Fuck the Patriots. Tom Brady’s a faggot. Fuck Tom Brady.”  
ME: “Now why did you have to go and put that fantasy in my head?”
COWBOY FAN: “What fantasy?”
ME: “Fucking Tom Brady.”
COWBOY FAN: “What?”
ME: “Fucking Tom Brady. I’d fuck Tom Brady.”
COWBOY FAN: “Okay, that’s a little weird.”
ME: “Why? He’s hot, don’t you think?”

He looks confused.

COWBOY FAN: “No . . no, I don’t.”