"It's CHRISTMAS," the custumor said. Do you know what CHRISTMAS is?"
"Spending
a lot of money and exchanging gifts?" I asked.
He gave me a dirty look.
"I suppose you have a 'Holiday Tree' at home?" he asked.
"No,
it's a Douglas fir," I replied.
Another dirty look.
"For the record, I try to stay neutral," I said. "I'm like Sweden. I alternate between 'Merry Christmas' and 'Happy Holidays' to be fair and all inclusive."
"What a
bunch of politically correct bullshit," the guy said. "People have
forgotten what Christmas is about."
"I
agree," I said. "It wasn't even a holiday until merchants persuaded
President Grant to make it one to boost sales and profits."
Another dirty look.
It seemed I was escalating rather than diffusing conflict
and hostilities. I felt bad. Whatever else Christmas may or may not be, I know it is NOT
about war.
Curious about General Bill O'Reilly's bold and glorious assaults against the subversive secular progressive uprising in America, I did a bit of research and recently learned this:
Christmas was pretty decadent in 17th century Europe. As a result, many of the puritans who fled England and settled America did not celebrate Christmas. In fact, Christmas was actually outlawed in Boston from 1659 until 1681. It wasn’t until the 19th century that Americans re-invented Christmas and changed it from a "raucous carnival holiday" into a "family-centered day of peace and nostalgia.'
Unemployment
was high and gang rioting by the disenchanted classes often occurred during the
Christmas season. In 1828, the New York city council instituted the city’s
first police force in response to a Christmas riot. This catalyzed certain
members of the upper classes to begin to change the way Christmas was
celebrated in America. In 1819, best-selling author Washington Irving wrote
"The Sketchbook of Geoffrey Crayon, Gent.," a series of stories about
the celebration of Christmas in an English manor house. The sketches feature a
squire who invited the peasants into his home for the holiday. In contrast to
the problems faced in America, the two groups mingled effortlessly. In
Irving’s mind, Christmas should be a "peaceful, warm-hearted holiday
bringing groups together across lines of wealth or social status."
Irving’s book, however, was not based on any holiday celebration he had
attended -- historians say his account actually “invented” tradition by
implying that it described the true customs of the season.
The North
and South were divided on the issue of Christmas, as well as on the question of
slavery. Many Northerners saw sin in the celebration of Christmas. But in the
South, Christmas was an important part of the social season. The first three
states to make Christmas a legal holiday were Alabama in 1836, and Louisiana
and Arkansas in 1838. In the years after the Civil War, Christmas traditions
spread across the country. Children's books played an important role in
spreading the customs of celebrating Christmas, especially the tradition of
trimmed trees and gifts delivered by Santa Claus. Sunday school classes
encouraged the celebration of Christmas. Women's magazines were also very
important in suggesting ways to decorate for the holidays, as well as how to
make these decorations.
President
Ulysses S. Grant declared Christmas a legal holiday in 1870. Since that time,
materialism, media, advertising, and mass marketing has made Christmas what it
is today. The traditions we enjoy at Christmas today were invented by
blending together customs from many different countries into what is now a national holiday.
A happy
holiday! A holiday known as Christmas.
So in the
true spirit of Christmas -- in the spirit of the famous "Christmas
Truce" of 1914 when British and German soldiers took a break from killing
each other during WWI and crossed trenches to peacefully mingle on Christmas
day -- I decided to use a more peaceful tactic.
"Well,
then, Merry Christmas to you!" I told the custumor.
He smiled.
"Thanks, and Merry Christmas to you as well," he said
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